The day I got over myself

Years ago I vowed never to color my hair.

Never. No matter what.

And when I vow to something, I hold onto that vow with all my stubborn might.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that I had hit the hair jackpot. Thick golden blonde locks with natural highlights. Hairstylists loved to tell me how women paid good money to have hair like mine. “Don’t ever color it,” they said. “I won’t,” I promised.

Then I had kids.

Man those kids. I mean, I love them and all, but they ruined my hair. (And my skin, but that’s another story.)

All of a sudden my blonde hair was coming in dark blonde. Then darker blonde. Then one day I went to buy blonde bobby pins and realized they stuck out on my head like chalk on a blackboard. Wait, was my hair brown now?

It was. And not a pretty shade of brown. More of a dirty dishwater brown with gray highlights that stuck out at odd angles.


Not only did I loathe my new hair color, but I noticed that it actually made my skin look worse. Even on my peppiest days, I looked tired.

My hair was weighing me down.

So I had a long talk with myself in the mirror. Was it really worth holding onto my stubborn promise if I wasn’t happy with the way I looked? A promise made long ago when I had perfectly beautiful blonde hair?

What was I holding onto, a promise or my pride?

I may be stubborn, but I decided that day not to be stupid.

I went to my hairstylist and told him it was time. I put my life, er, I mean my hair in his capable hands.

How I got over my stubborn self and highlighted my hair.

I was nervously texting hair foil photos to friends and trying to pay attention to my book while I waited.

But I didn’t need to worry. He did an amazing job. The color looks so natural that I feel like I’m looking in the mirror at myself from a few years ago. My skin looks better and my eyes look brighter.

How I got over my stubborn self and highlighted my hair |

I look like me. And that’s better than being stubborn any day.

  • JenniferTyree October 2, 2014 at 2:26 pm

    Don’t you just love how having kids sucks the life out of you! LOL. My hair changed too. I chopped off 17 inches because of it! All the shedding over a year later wasn’t good for the baby. So now I’m growing it back. And its healthier now (I dyed it quite a bit back then, bleach, pink, black and red LOL). My natural color is a tad darker than what yours was coming in at. A dishwater blonde. Dirty blonde. Whatever you want to call it, its not pretty. Lighter looks good on me. Though I dyed my hair maybe once or twice since it was cut, its now naturally colored. (because the red in my profile pic here literally washed out within a few weeks and left me with all natural color). I really miss putting colors in it. I think I will lighten it a little, and add some color (light purple!).
    Great post. Glad to see I’m not alone.

  • Dina K. Rabin October 2, 2014 at 2:34 pm

    I love this post! Your hair looks beautiful! I have been having this same internal battle. I have never colored my hair— but with having kids and turning 35- everything about my hair has changed from the color to the texture to the thickness. You have inspired me to make a hair appt— can I ask because I know nothing about color— did you get a single process?

  • Andrea Worley October 2, 2014 at 2:37 pm


  • Erin Kreitz Shirey October 2, 2014 at 2:50 pm

    I gave up that promise a while ago…genetics of gray hair took over. AS did 3 kids, life’s stressors and realized feeling like “me” was worth every penny of hair dye. Have fun with it! it looks great!!

  • Rebecca P. October 2, 2014 at 3:36 pm

    Your so gorgeous! Inside and out! XOXO

  • Fiona MacDonald October 3, 2014 at 8:28 am

    Oh this kills me! I went grey during my last year of University and on a brunette that AIN’T cool…..good for you for taking the plunge! It will be easier to manage being blonde ..grows out slowly but man a good hair cut/colour does amazing things!

  • Robin October 3, 2014 at 9:22 am

    The first thought that went through my mind when I saw your final pic was, “Oh my gosh, she looks like Leila!” I had to laugh and remind myself that it’s actually the other way around… Leila looks like you – two beauties!

  • Stephanie Sheaffer October 3, 2014 at 9:47 pm

    Very pretty!

    I haven’t ever dyed my hair…but perhaps one day! Never say never. 😉

  • Holly October 4, 2014 at 5:09 pm

    Looks great! My hair is blonde and naturally curly. After having my son, I must have lost half of it, so what I’m left with is a frizzy lifeless mess and like you it’s getting progressively darker. I gave in this summer and got some highlights so I would look half way decent for my cousin’s wedding. I had the colorist do ombre in the front so I wouldn’t have to go back every 6-8 weeks when it grows out. What a difference! It even makes the sleep deprivation bags under my eyes less noticeable. LOL.